I tried so hard and got so far but in the end it doesn't even matter...I tried to be the flawless for her even though I am so flawed. She's all I have got my only best friend, for I really do cherish her very very very much. But what I have got now is this kind of shit...Am I being too sensitive? I don't know...She always seem to have no time for me, I do appreciate she tries to make time to go out with me...The weird thing is that everytime I ask her if she is free on her birthday she says she have to go somewhere...Now in the holidays(one week) I am very free I ask her out she says she's busy with school stuff, I understand she's in a new school...But what I understand from today is that she does not have school, and her friend is having a sleep over at her house...And her friend is using her Msn messanger telling me they are having a sleep over which is very fun, she pretended to be her at first, after I found out, I said "I got sixth sense not it's guts feeling" she replied that I am -> "a bit slow onli the gut." What is this suppose to mean...? Yeah maybe I am being little sensitive...Now I know how is it to feel that someone you have been treating as a best friend for so long and this shit happends...I am really hurt...I wasted my precious time on her...Hurt me deep so deep I feel like crying, yeah I did in the end cry...I guess I put too much, too much commitment on her...This just makes me more numb more numb...Throwing my faith away...Never gonna trust people anymore...I don't know anymore...I really don't...What are friends? I don't have any friends I really dun have...Though I can be seen quite close to them but the fact is that they are just acquiantance...They just push me away when I wanted to be close to them...I don't know about this anymore, I feel like being backstabbed...Feeling alot alot more lonely than ever........